As all of you loyal followers can see, I have abandoned yet another blog. But I am determined to get it back on track! It is the same thing I tell people when I hear excuses for not traveling or not moving or not doing something they truly desire. I desire to write about my experiences, but there is always some excuse– they’re always lame and usually involve me doing something I never do, like cleaning (although necessary), to avoid the blank page staring at me. Every voice in your head telling you that you aren’t capable is just another indication that you in fact are. It is your chance to break through the own walls that we all unintentionally take on.
Last November (2013) I met Cristina, author of the blog Chronicles of a Travel Addict, at a travel industry event I organize and we instantly clicked. We started talking about our travel experiences and I knew instantly that we’d continue to be friends even after the event ended. The next day I received a tweet from Cristina asking if I’d like to write a guest post for her blog about my time in Spain. Surprised, flattered and nervous, I replied with an instant “Of course!” not knowing exactly what I had gotten myself into.
I eagerly started writing and re-writing my blog post. Ideas were flowing out of my head onto paper. I’d write a paragraph, delete it, add more until I ultimately felt defeated. During this process (which took about 3 months from when she asked me until I completed it), I had even gone to Spain for Christmas to visit my husband’s family. I thought that would provide the much needed inspiration to get my thoughts onto paper.
I forced myself to use my time in Spain I had just experienced to channel it into my post. When I finished what I thought was an acceptable post, I did the most idiotic thing and sent to it my brother. Knowing fully that he would criticize my work- he is an accomplished writer himself- I sent it as my final push to try to get some inspiration. Of course, as a writer, he was not aware of the sting that his blunt words sent to my core. Essentially, that it was crap. I was also not aware at the time that it was in fact the inspiration I was looking for.
I had a conversation with myself that I tend to do more often than I’d like: “Maybe you’re not a writer. Maybe you’re not meant to write your experiences in words. Maybe you should just give up.” I even convinced myself that all of this was okay. I didn’t need to write to be who I want to be.
Until one morning, I woke up and had this feeling like I needed to get my computer and vomit all over the keyboard; word vomit, that is. The words flowed out like never before. I wasn’t even fully conscious of the sentences I was forming, I just let it happen freely. I had written my entire blog post in the span of 20 minutes and there it was in all its glory. I sent it to Cristina and she published it that day.
It may not make writing history, but it will make history in my book. Once published, I proudly sent it to my brother needing not to hear his words of praise, but feeling encouraged with his positive response. It’s so interesting how people can read the energy you put forth. I knew my first post wasn’t my best work; it was forced and didn’t feel right. People sense that, too.
I want to thank my brother for always being my honest critic, but supporting me when I need it. And most importantly Cristina for inspiring me to share my story. And especially for her patience.
And now, hoping there hasn’t been too much build-up, I present to you A Year In Spain. There will more more where that came from.
This is me. In my Wild.
Sofia In The Wild 